The Feisty Lucy

An ode to the Juicy Lucy - this is the Feisty Lucy, a spicy version. I happen to know a very feisty little red-head named Lucy, for whom I have named this burger.

Need:

ground beef
ground pork
1 tbsp chopped jalapeno
1 clove chopped garlic
2 tbsps cream cheese
1 tbsp of grated onion
s+p
garlic powder

burger fixin's -

1. In a bowl, combine the pork and the beef. Add grated onion and mix well.

2. Saute the garlic and jalapeno until translucent. Mix with cream cheese.

3. Form patties, then put a scoop of the jalapeno-garlic-cheese mixture. Fold the meat around it and flatten it. S+p and garlic powder. Then grill

I ALWAYS add cheese on top as well. This one is pictured with some Irish cheddar, bacon, grilled onions, tomato, lettuce, avocado, and mayo. Grill the bun too. If you really want to add some fat, slather the grilled buns with a bit of butter before the mayo. Delicious, but asking for a heart attack. Thank you, Wisconsin, for THAT idea.

Eggs Blackstone

Everybody always talks about eggs benedict. I love eggs benedict. But every once in awhile, you've got to mix it up with some fried deliciousness. Eggs Blackstone uses bacon and a fried egg, rather than Canadian bacon and a poached egg.

Need:
bacon
egg
toasted bread
hollandaise sauce (see below)
2 egg yolks
butter
lemon juice
salt
Tabasco sauce

1. Fry bacon. Fry your eggs, toast your bread. Assemble

2. Make hollandaise sauce (I don't blame you if you add water to a package, but it's super easy to make from scratch) - using a double boiler (or a Pyrex measuring cup in a sauce pan full of boiling water) add butter. Once it is melted, add egg yolks, lemon juice, salt and a dash of Tabasco. The Tabasco is not traditional, but it's how I make mine and I LOVE it. Whisk furiously until the sauce lightens in color and thickens. If it gets too thick too fast, add a tsp of the boiling water to it and keep whisking. If it curdles, you can save it this way. You can also strain it through a fine mesh sieve. Don't give up. It's easy, but it takes a ton of practice to know how to get it just right. OR you can open a package and add water.

Chile Rellenos - Light

So after the last two days of food hugs and comfort, this night I needed something a little lighter. This version of chile rellenos is light and does not need to be deep-fried. Thank GOD. I don't think my arteries could take much more of this torture.

Need:

pasilla or poblano chiles
1 can of tuna
finely minced onion
finely minced Serrano pepper
chopped tomatoes
mayonnaise (REAL mayonnaise. If you even talk to me about Miracle Whip, you're out)
squeeze of lime
black pepper

1. Turn on your grill or your broiler and char the peppers. Then put them in a Ziploc bag and seal it. After about 10 minutes, PUT ON SOME RUBBER GLOVES, open the bag, and peel the charred skin off of the peppers under cool, running water. Carefully, spilt pepper open and remove seeds and ribs. If you don't wear gloves during this procedure, it WILL burn.

2. While the peppers are charring and steaming, go ahead and make the tuna salad. Mix together all of the rest of the ingredients. Once the peppers are peeled and seeded, stuff the peppers with the tuna.

This is amazing. I eat it with rice. I know it sounds weird, but give it a try.

Southern Fried Comfort II - Fried Pork Chops

This day was particularly upsetting, so I decided that artery-clogging was in order. You're welcome.

Need:

Pork chops (I used bone-in, either works)
crackers
oregano
sage
s+p
1 egg
1 tbsp. of milk
oil for frying (once again, Crisco or lard is best)

For white gravy:

some kind of meat fat (bacon grease, sausage grease, duck fat, schmaltz)
flour
milk
oregano
s+p

1. Dry the pork chops. Whisk the egg and milk together.

2. Beat the living snot out of the crackers with a hammer. Very therapeutic. I happen to have a meat tenderizer that looks like brass knuckles, courtesy of my brother. You'd better believe I used that bad boy to DESTROY those crackers. Keep in mind the salt content of the crackers you use when you're salting - ex: don't add salt to saltines unless you want to die. I had fancy crackers on hand, they needed a little salt.

3. Dredge pork chops in egg/milk mixture, then coat with pulverized crackers. Its okay if the crackers are not uniformly fine, by the way. Fry the pork chops on medium in a cast iron pan until they're done.

4. In a saucepan, add the meat-fat and let it heat up on medium. Then whisk in some flour and let it cook for about 1 minute. We're just cooking the raw-ness out of the flour, not browning. Whisk in some milk and the oregano, s+p. As it comes to a simmer, turn off the heat and keep whisking to prevent lumps from forming. It will thicken significantly.

Served with a side of mashed potatoes and garlic-sautéed green beans.

Its Been a Loooooooong Week - Southern Fried Comfort -

 

I apologize. I've promised you more of me and this week I dropped the ball. It's been a rough week. So this go 'round, I offer you comfort food. Because we could all use a little hug from food now and then.

This first one will be my chicken Milanesa. Almost every culture has their breaded, fried meat dish. Mine is a Mexican style version. Usually made with some cut of steak, we've changed it to chicken breast over the years and have always had rave reviews from people.

Need:

Thinly sliced chicken breast
1 can of evaporated milk
plain, fine breadcrumbs
1 tsp chicken bouillon
oil for frying (lard or Crisco is best)

1. Marinate chicken breast in evaporated milk. This makes the chicken super moist and tender. Trust.

2. Mix the chicken bouillon into the breadcrumbs and then dredge the chicken in it. Seriously. People have tried to replicate this recipe and I never tell them about the chicken bouillon. The secret is out.

Notice the picture above shows the Milanesa with a pico de gallo salsa on it. I'll include it here for easy reference:

Need:

Tomatoes, chopped
onions, finely chopped
cilantro, finely chopped
Serrano or jalapeno pepper, finely chopped
garlic, finely chopped
lime juice
salt

Throw it all together, except the salt. Salt when you are about ready to serve, otherwise it draws the moisture out of the tomatoes.

Tuna Salad Nicoise

 

I LOVE Nicoise salads. I was introduced to this a few years ago at a work bachelorette party held at a restaurant. Fun fact: if you're ever at a bachelorette party and a penis cake is involved, know that you'll be forced to perform, ifyouknowwhatimean. Be ready, bride-to-be.

 

Anyway, this French salad has so much variety and flavor. If you're wondering why it is in a gigantic, food-service grade Tupperware, this is my lunch for tomorrow. Making lunch like a BOSS.

 

Need:

olives (Nicoise is best, and obviously the namesake, but any work)

thinly sliced onion

2 hard boiled eggs

1 can of drained tuna

some cherry tomatoes, sliced in half

some boiled potato, cut into bite-sized pieces

blanched green beans, cut into bite sized pieces

lettuce (not pictured, packed separately to prevent wilting)

red wine vinegar

olive oil

s+p

Dijon mustard

minced fresh herbs, if you have them

 

1. Place lettuce on a plate. This salad looks prettiest when it is served like above. You don't want to dive into a pile of crap all over the place. Place the eggs, olives, tuna, onions, potatoes, green beans, and tomatoes on top of the lettuce in groupings.

 

2. In a jar, pour in olive oil, red wine vinegar, Dijon mustard, s+p, and fresh herbs. Olive oil and vinegar should be in a 2:1 ratio. Add no more what a tsp. of Dijon mustard. Close the jar and shake it like a Polaroid picture. Drizzle over the salad.

 

People are going to be SO jelly of my lunch tomorrow. I love it when that happens.

 

 



 

Spaghetti and Meatballs

 

 I have a confession to make to you guys about this. This picture is my leftovers from the night before. In fact, one of these meatballs is half-eaten; can you guess which one? Its not nearly as pretty as it was last night. By the time I remembered to take a picture, the meal was half gone. Such a hassle, you people are! Just kidding. Still love you.

Need:
2 cans of San Marzano pureed tomatoes
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1/4 onion, grated
1 tbsp of olive oil
some wine
2 tsp minced basil
2 tsp minced parsley
1/4 tsp of red pepper flakes

For the Meatballs:
1 pckg of ground beef
1 pckg of ground pork
1 egg
1/2 C of plain breadcrumbs
1 tbsp of dried oregano
1 tsp of garlic powder
1/2 C of grated Romano cheese
some fresh minced herbs, if you have them

1. In a large sauce pan, add olive oil, garlic and red pepper flakes and sauté on med-low for about 1 minute.

2. Add canned tomato and bring to a simmer. Add, wine, basil and parsley.

3. Put all of the meatball ingredients in a large bowl and mix thoroughly (getcha hands in there!). If it seems a little dry, add milk a tsp at a time. If it seems too wet, add a little more breadcrumb. Form balls and place in simmering sauce. Cover and cook for 45 minutes on low, moving meatballs around halfway through.

4. To serve, I usually remove the meatballs and put them on a nice plate, then cover in a bit of sauce. Then I sprinkle with chopped herbs and little parmesan cheese. I add boiled pasta directly to the sauce and stir until fully covered. Add a 1 tbsp of butter here too (any excuse to add butter). Then add fresh chopped herbs and serve on plates. Meatballs on top. This earned "Yums!" from the WHOLE, very critical, family.